Dear Bobby W. Miller

I would like very much to thank you. I wasn't expecting to hear from you, and most certainly wasn't expecting you to write an in-depth letter answering my questions. But the biggest surprise of all was you asking my opinion on the status quo knowing I'm gay. Here's your answer.

I never feel threatened or disgusted when I see two men or two women holding hands in an adoring way, so long as they are considerate of the non-gays who might be present. But I feel extreme fear and nausea on encountering bathroom queers like Senator Larry Craig and mass murderers wearing Christian smiles on their faces and flags in their lapels like George W. Bush and Richard Cheney. But the worst feeling of all is the apathy I feel on hearing that a Bush/Cheney supporter lost a loved one in Iraq. That a tornado or flood wiped out everything they had worked for all their lives. While it's abundantly clear they take no responsibility for the lives they've destroyed, I lay it right at their doorstep and say, 'Serves you right hypocrite.' I'm I wrong?

Dear Mr. Carlos Sanchez:

Are you wrong? I'm sure Larry Craig, Bush and Cheney, and their supporters would unanimously agree that you're wrong. I, on the other hand, feel about these people you mentioned as I did a religious nut I worked with. He showed up on my porch one day and said that he had decided to kill himself, but didn't have a gun. He asked to borrow mine. I went inside, put two shells in a double barrel shotgun and gave it to him. He pulled both hammers back, put it in his mouth and pulled both triggers. I called the cops and, after they got what was left of this guy off my porch, I washed it down. I then took my wife out to lunch and a movie. Came home and made love. All and all, it was a very exciting and fulfilling day.

Respectfully,
Bobby W. Miller